Identify what is most important )0( Eliminate everything else
The idea that some lives matter less is the root of all that is wrong with the world. Dr. Paul Farmer
The suffering of others is not alleviated when no one knows about it.
There is no one right way to live. Daniel Quinn Ishmael
The only thing that you need to start an asylum is an empty room and the right sort of people.
We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be. Kurt Vonnegut

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

fud

Bacon, $6.49 per pound, on sale for $4.99.

No thanks, and it was a more perfect shock because I cannot remember the last time I bought bacon.

All right, some healthy nuts, then.  Almonds, $8.99.  So, look at the macadamia nuts.  $19.99 instead of the 12.99 per pound when I last bought them.  No half pound for me.  How about some pistachios.  On sale for $7.49 a pound.

Well, I will just have to buy some cheap meat for protein.  Inexpensive cuts are $8.99 and then go all the way up to $13.00.  Even the beautiful ground beef started at $4.99 per pound.  It has been a long time...so, staying with beans and pulses and grains combinations.

Citrus?  Oranges? Fergetaboutit.  Green peppers, leaf lettuce, cucumbers, carrots...whew...I can get those.  Apples.  Yes.  Back to grab a bag of the least expensive oranges.

Chickpeas for hummus.  Cottage cheese, but no eggs at that price.

And, it went on and on through the aisles. 

I should never start my grocery shopping at the regular markets.  No matter that I was exhausted from the dentist and a full day of meetings and fixing stuff.  All I wanted was some basic food and a couple of luxury items.  Frankly, I think a quick sandwich from the drive-through would have been better than trying to buy enough food for the week with the money I had.

For what I settled on to actually buy, I overspent.

So be it.

I have enough food so that I will not have to shop again until next Monday or Tuesday, and it will take place at the discount market, where I can shop without panicking, where I know in advance what the prices will be and where I am comfortable setting down my cash. 

I do have to admit that the food there, especially the fresh produce, was glorious.  All shiny and crisp and the variety was amazing.  So many varieties of apples and lettuces and, gosh, all of the sweet pepper varieties.  The meat...lordy.  It was obviously of much higher quality than at my regular market and I am certain that the prices there properly reflected that.

I passed up on so many of my regular purchases because of the prices, even though the quality of every single fresh food was amazing.  I am envious, really envious of those who can shop there regularly. 

In most cases, those fresh foods are pretty much the same in terms of nutrition, most likely exactly the same.  Still.  Canned and frozen food is the same everywhere, both in quality and nutrition.  I did not have to buy any of that stuff, as I keep a humble pantry.

I am pretty much a totally glass-full kind of girl and I embrace and honor the abundance that I have in my life. 

I never should have shopped there, because although I will enjoy the things I bought last night, I now have that contrast coming when I go back to my regular market.

The worst part is that this is an entirely and insanely first world problem.  Even my regular, discount market contains hundreds more items at a higher quality than is available to most of the world's people and their families.  I am feeling like such a selfish and entitled brat. 

Factor in that I can buy cake once in a while and my bratty levels increase exponentially.

Allrighty.  I will get over feeling deprived or whatever the heck this is.  I am hoping that this experience will help me be more realistic and grateful for everything I have, which is really, really a lot.  More than most people and certainly more than I need or deserve.  The world is full of people who experience serious food insecurity and I will never have to worry about starving or even going hungry for long. 

I have resources to pay for dental work and for all the food I need.  And, cake once in a while, chocolate more frequently.  Last night was big-girl-panties time and I missed that opportunity to be my best self.  But, today is another day and the chance to put all of this into perspective and I am doing that.  Yay for abundance and knowing the blessing that is and boo for entitlement.  Balance, here I come.

5 comments:

  1. I think with all that you've survived and all that you are doing to help others to survive, you've earned the right to a piece of cake! Of course your hips might not thank you ;-D xxx

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  2. PS The cost of healthier food compared to junk is appalling! It's the same here, healthy foods should be tax free! Rant over...as you were! x

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  3. Don't you go hungry now, J! Just think....just outside our back door we have three macadamia nut trees! Wish I could send you some.

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  4. I keep a good supply of flour and baking essentials at home and make my own cakes. My purse thanks me even if my behind doesn't :)

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  5. I got up this morning, caught an accidental glimpse of my ass and swore off of anything sweet, except for the really dark chocolate stuff. I might have to avoid grains for a while, too.

    Ah, cake. I knew you well.

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