training

I am still much exhausted from this week's training.  The last day ended early, I ran a few errands on the way home

I digress to say thanks, dear friend for stopping by with your sweet and charming dog and leaving a memento to facilitate remembering your visit.  The fleas said to say "Hi!"

So, one of the errands was to stop by the vet clinic and buy nearly a hundred dollars of specialized flea treatment, the one that will not cause CoolCat to go into cardiac arrest, or get beriberi, or have a psychic break, or some damn thing.  All I can say is that I am so glad that I did not stop to get the couple of things the house needs, or do any grocery shopping.  My little guy comes first, and it pleases me very much that, in the midst of living with some important economies, I did not hesitate to put him first.  I will not have money to de-flea the house for some time, but at least the nasty buggers will stay off of him.

So,anyway, I came home, stripped (sorry about the mind image...shudder), turned on the air conditioning unit, made a quick detour into the shower to cool off, had a quick dinner, went to bed early and slept until 10:30 this morning.

I feel great, but still mentally packed-to-the-gills.  The training was amazing.  The presenters even more so.  I made so many wonderful friends, especially S, E, R, E and too many to mention without leaving someone out.

I will be processing this for days and when I can, I will put down here every part that I can.  It is the only way that I will ever remember.

I will share, however, that the most immediate benefit from this week is that I have learned some important things about setting and communicating and respecting boundaries that need to be established with some of the people in my life.  An insurmountable problem has been rendered surmountable.  Doable in a way that preserves me and, if I am lucky, some of the relationships that I would like to keep.

Another aspect that I need to write about is that finishing this training has left me feeling stronger and will significantly less fear.  Mostly about my personal safety.  I will not be living foolishly, but staying safe is a much more manageable part of how I will be spending my time.  I want a decent, reasonably safe life, not so focused on that other person and those things he is still capable of doing, but I also do not want to be carefree and dead. 

That would just be a darn shame after coming through all of this.  Sounds like a good compromise.  It also sounds like I will have to actually use my Y membership.  Rats.  Should have known there was a catch.

So, off to turn the AC back on, look for something edible, aside from the cookies I forgot I hid in the upper cabinet, and maybe put in a DVD and hope to say awake until bedtime.

Life is freaking good.  I mean, who could have ever, possibly known that this was where my life was leading me.  I keep thinking that and saying it aloud.  Seriously.  How could I have ever, ever imagined this.