Identify what is most important )0( Eliminate everything else
The idea that some lives matter less is the root of all that is wrong with the world. Dr. Paul Farmer
The suffering of others is not alleviated when no one knows about it.
There is no one right way to live. Daniel Quinn Ishmael
The only thing that you need to start an asylum is an empty room and the right sort of people.
We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be. Kurt Vonnegut

Monday, August 26, 2013


It has been a weird weekend.  I am not sure that I want to do much anymore.  Yeah, I still love my work and the potential, additional opportunities to do more if I pass my state certification, but I am feeling weak.  My body feels weak.

More importantly, my will to keep moving forward, to keep working on my recovery, well, it just is not there.  I should have paid bills and/or studied for my exam next month.  I could have done more organizing.  That last one was the closest to being accomplished.  If I finished that, all of the remaining boxes, baskets and bins would be put away, making this whole place look great.  If everything were put away, it really would be a one-time job, as organized stuff stays organized, or at least the little messes stay in one room.

But, I am not doing that.  I am all energized and interested and I go to that room and look at it and walk away.  The new dishes and bowls are still in their bags and boxes.  I do nothing and I am exhausted.  I nap.  I sit.  I am glad that hot dogs were on sale when I took R shopping last week, or I would not have anything to eat, except chocolate, and that is boring, the chocolate.  I could never have imagined that I would be uninterested in food, especially chocolate.

I do not feel depressed or any increase in my depression, but that must be the reason.  

I wonder how I can be this self aware and still not be motivated to do what needs being done. 

So, I will be taking myself to organize some more.  It will be wonderful to have that space in which to work, mess around and play with the boys. I go...

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