Identify what is most important )0( Eliminate everything else
The idea that some lives matter less is the root of all that is wrong with the world. Dr. Paul Farmer
The suffering of others is not alleviated when no one knows about it.
There is no one right way to live. Daniel Quinn Ishmael
The only thing that you need to start an asylum is an empty room and the right sort of people.
We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be. Kurt Vonnegut

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

S, M and Tuesday

Sunday was a mess. 
BREAKFAST
leftover steak

LUNCH
1/4 cup of the leftover guacamole
celery

SNACK
big cup of homemade nut mix

DINNER
nothing; I was too tired when I got home at 11:30 p.m. and went straight to bed.

Monday
BREAKFAST
nothing; chose sleep instead

LUNCH
grilled American and mozzarella cheese, tomato and bacon, on marbled rye sandwich
small order of sweet potato fries
catsup
6 jalapeno poppers; I tore the cream cheese tops off and plucked the pepper halves from the breading, and then ate one of the torn-off cheese and breading pieces, too.

Between therapy and the art class, I returned a phone call from my doctor's office.  It was the results of my tests last week.  The results are not good.  I have to experiment with some stupid statin drug.  I have never, ever, ever had a single blip on my cholesterol levels. My blood glucose results are really bad.  Something else was not great, but I cannot remember what it is.  They think I have celiac disease and I am going to allow that test when I go back in October to test again for how the statin med is working.

Granted, it is barely three weeks since I started eating better, although when thinking about the testing results, nothing I have been doing could have even a potential effect on any of the problem areas.

So, in true J form, I mood altered with lunch.  Frankly, there is only an Eastern European and a sports themed restaurants within walking distance, and the sports place was the easy choice.  I ordered the sandwich and then, with hardly a pause, added the fries and poppers, which I intended to share when I walked back, but my lunch companions did not want any.  Yummy, but bad for me, big-picture wise.

DINNER
half of a steak
cherries
melon

Bummed out from the phone call and stupid lunch, I stopped at the discount market to get vegetables and they had t-bone steak on sale for $4.00 a pound.  I bought two, came home and cooked them.  They are like mush, and do not taste all that great.  They are in the refrigerator and I will probably chop them up and toss in a pan with vegetables, may make a curry.

Looking back, I had barely one meal on Sunday and hardly more on Monday.  

Today I had a salad with tomato and avocado and I feel tummy-troubled, but that might be because I am upset about this whole food mess.  Someone at one of my jobs keeps trying to convince me to get one of the bullet machines and chop stuff into a smoothie.  I would probably use it a couple of times, and unless I gave it away, it would sit around somewhere, just mocking me in its expensive and pompous manner until I gave it away.  Sounds like an exercise in heartbreak and regret to me.

I wanted to laze around today.  Instead I am taking my older friend to lunch and then to a meeting with an aging specialist to plan some being safe classes and find other resources that might allow her to stay in her home.  We will stop for groceries on the way home and then I have to get to the laundromat.  Clean bedding is calling my name.

I just got off the phone with her and we have to do something.  The we is her and me.  I am simply the person who takes her where she wants to go, but this morning's telephone conversation reminded me that I am her only social contact in this city.  All of her friends have moved away or are dead.  The sweet desperation in her voice when trying to keep me on the phone is something that I would like to see turned around.  My preference is that she would have to end her conversations with me because she had other things to do.  I am tired.

6 comments:

  1. Life likes to throw bloody curveballs at ya doesn't it! :( It is so hard to kick bad habit eating, I did that Jenny Craig diet, spent a bloody fortune on it and now I'm back to where I started. So pissed off, why can't some of us just have the perfect metabolism and be able to eat what we like? I have told myself now, I am what I am and to be honest I don't shove food down my gob, although I did scoff half a big bar of chocolate last night! Oops! It just jumped right in there!! lol Keep up the good work with watching what you eat, it must pay off in the end, although it doesn't look like much food in a day. Your friend is lucky to have you, why does life end up being so darned hard for people sometimes, doesn't seem fair does it. And don't I sound like a moaning Minnie today lol xx

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  2. J, perhaps your GP could refer you to a dietician especially if you do have coeliac disease as you do have to be careful with what you eat. You certainly don't seem to be having a balanced diet at present. Mind you, I often wonder what I would eat myself if I lived on my own and didn't have to cook for anyone. ;-)

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  3. A dietician sounds like a good idea. I am not doing all that well on my own, I guess. It is weird that I am not hungry no matter how little I eat, except for when I wake in the morning.

    I have never had an eating disorder, unless you count loving dark, dark chocolate beyond all reasonable sense, and I do not want to fall into one now. Nor, do I want to end up there because I am stupid about what I eat, you know, full consciousness and all that.

    The stuff I am eating now is good quality and healthy food. Not too much, no added fats. It is weird that having added flesh to what I eat that there is so little appetite for vegetables. Have to think on that some more.

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  4. No wonder you have 'Southern Hemisphere' problems if you have coeliac disease. I thought for a while you had a problem with us 'Down Under'. LOL!

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  5. The only problem I have with Down Under is that I am not there.

    Yeah, my own, personal southern hemisphere. Sounds so much better than complaining about diarrhea all the time.

    Besides, I like having my own hemisphere. Yes, I do.

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  6. Long hours, not enough sleep and irregular eating can't be doing you much good :(. Be careful of the statins, especially if it's Lipitor, as it made me ache...all the time....so I stopped taking it and became almost vegetarian for 2 months as well as drinking herbal teas I had researched that would help. My Doctor at the time wasn't happy but I lowered the cholesterol by 2 points and didn't need to stop exercising because I wasn't in pain anymore.

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